when you and ya bestfriend say something at the exact same time
My older cat got sick of my kitten trying to play with him so he pinned him down and licked him until he fell asleep
*puts on lifejacket* i am ready for intercourse
i hate the phrase “life is short” because life is literally the longest thing that any of us will ever experience
unless you experience my penis
I just choked on my food.
that’s not the only thing you’ll choke on
Don’t they usually put choking hazard warnings on really small things?
A flower or two, from us to you. #thegaybeards
WHY ARE PHONES GETTING BIGGER WHEN GIRLS STILL BARELY HAVE POCKETS IN THEIR PANTS